The Opening Ceremony Lyrics

The Opening Ceremony lyrics

Benny Andersson, Tim Rice, and Bjorn Ulvaeus
ARBITER:
 I've a duty as the
referee
 At the start of the match
 On behalf of all our sponsors
 I
must welcome you
 Which I do -- there's a catch
 I don't care if you're a
champion
 No one messes with me
 I am ruthless in upholding
 What I
know is right
 Black or white -- as you'll see
 I'm on the case
 Can't
be fooled
 Any objection
 Is overruled
 Yes I'm the Arbiter and I know
best
 CHORUS:
 He's impartial, don't push him, he's unimpressed

ARBITER:
 You got your tricks
 Good for you
 But there's no gambit I
don't see through
 Oh I'm the Arbiter I know the score
 CHORUS:
 From
square one he'll be watching all 64
 ARBITER:
 If you're thinking of the
kind of thing
 That we've seen in the past
 Chanting gurus,
walkie-talkies,
 Walkouts, hypnotists,
 Tempers, fists -- not so fast

This is not the start of World War Three
 No political ploys
 I think both
your constitutions are terrific so
 Now you know -- be good boys
 I'm on
the case
 Can't be fooled
 Any objection
 Is overruled
 Yes I'm the
Arbiter and I know best
 CHORUS:
 He's impartial, don't push him, he's
unimpressed
 ARBITER:
 You got your tricks
 Good for you
 But
there's no gambit I don't see through
 Oh I'm the Arbiter I know the
score
 CHORUS:
 From square one he'll be watching all 64
 ARBITER:

Yes I'm the Arbiter I know the score
 CHORUS:
 From square one he'll be
watching all 64
 DIPLOMATS:
 No one can deny that these are difficult
times...
 It's the U.S. versus U.S.S.R.
 Yet we more or less are --

No one can deny that these are difficult times...
 -- to our credit putting
all that aside
 We have swallowed our pride
 These are dangerous and
difficult times...
 It really doesn't matter who comes out
 on top, who
gets the chop
 No one's way of life is threatened by a flop --
 But we're
gonna smash their bastard
 Make him wanna change his name
 Take him to the
cleaners and devastate him
 Wipe him out, humiliate him
 We don't want the
whole world saying
 They can't even win a game
 We have never reckoned

On coming second
 There's no use in losing
 It's the U.S. versus
U.S.S.R.
 Yet we more or less are --
 No one can deny that these are
difficult times
 -- to our credit putting all that aside
 We have
swallowed our pride
 These are very difficult and dangerous times...
 The
value of events like this need not be stressed
 When East and West
 Can
meet as comrades, ease the tension over drinks
 Through sporting links

As long as their man sinks
 MERCHANDISERS:
 Whether you are pro or
anti
 Or could not care less
 We are here to tell you
 We are here to
sell you chess
 Not a chance of you escaping from our wiles
 We've locked
the doors, we've blocked the aisles
 We've a franchise worth exploiting

And we will -- yes we will!
 When it comes to merchandising
 We could
kill
 When you get up --
 When you get up in the morning
 Till you
crash at night
 You will have to live your life
 With bishop, rook and
knight
 Clean your teeth with chequered toothpaste
 Wear our vests

Our kings and queens on bouncing breasts
 You could even buy a set
 And
learn to play
 We don't mind we'll sell you something
 Anyway
 We've
done all our market research
 And our findings show
 That this game of
chess could be around
 A month or so
 Maybe it's a bit confusing
 For
a game
 But Rubik's Cubes were much the same
 In the end the whole world
bought one
 All were gone
 By which time we merchandisers
 Had moved
on
 By which time we had moved on!
 ARBITER:
 I'm on the case, can't
be fooled
 Any objection is overruled
 Don't try to tempt me -- you've no
hope
 I don't like women, I don't take dope
 I'm the Arbiter I know the
score
 CHORUS:
 From square one he'll be watching all 64
 ARBITER:

You got your tricks -- good for you
 But there is no gambit I don't see
through
 I'm the Arbiter and I know best
 CHORUS:
 He's impartial
don't push him he's unimpressed
 ARBITER:
 I'm the Arbiter my word is
law
 CHORUS:
 From square one he'll be watching you...
 EVERYONE
(except the players and seconds):
 Don't you find it rather touching to
behold
 The game that came in from the cold
 Seen for what it is --
religion plus finesse
 Countries, classes, creeds, as one in
 Love of
chess