Fear Of Flying Lyrics

Fear Of Flying lyrics

Phyllis was a physicist, 
a fairly good ventriloquist, 
a free-lance photographer 
but don’t call her a feminist. 
Some challenges she’d nail 
on the very first try, 
but she felt like a failure 
for she was afraid to fly. 
 
Our friend the ace in physics 
found herself in a great fix: 
had to book a flight from Philly 
to her family out in Phoenix. 
F-f-fear of flying made her 
positively petrified 
But she could brave math equations; 
she could face her fear and fly. 
 
Fortunately our feisty physicist 
found a fancy, pricey therapist 
Felix P. Fellini 
Neo-Freudian psychologist 
(the P stands for Phredrick) 
He said Phyllis, first and foremost 
we must identify 
whether your father or your mother 
made you so afraid to fly. 
 
Our physicist got physical 
confronting her fears 
pounding on pillows 
chastising empty chairs 
After four thousand dollars 
and forty thousand tears, 
although she’s still afraid to fly, 
at least now she can tell you why. 
(Maybe she doesn’t fully understand... but she’s so close)  
  
 She met her friend the phrenologist 
who was once a pharmacologist 
until 1967 
when he met up with a Marxist 
but that’s another story 
I may bore you by and by. 
For now let’s stick to Phyllis 
who is still afraid to fly. 
The former pharmacologist 
gave Phyllis a flask 
of a pretty potent potion 
He said Put on this medical mask. 
It’s flammable fluid 
What’s in it? Don’t ask. 
But if you want to learn to fly, 
this stuff is sure to get you high. 
(I mean, metaphorically, of course. 
By the way, you have some very interesting bumps on your head) 
Phyllis of Philadelphia 
finally felt free of phobia 
Fifteen hours later she found herself 
in Florida 
waxing philosophic 
with a fellow Gemini 
How she got there, she’s forgotten. 
Now she’s more afraid to fly. 
Though phobic about airports 
she phoned that very night 
She said Look, I need to book 
a f-f-f-f-f-f-flight. 
Have you got one to Phoenix? 
Tomorrow? Alright. 
Sure, tomorrow’s fine for me to fly. 
Oh my. 
She boarded the plane 
with her Walkman playing Streisand 
Frozen to her seat, about to greet 
the friendly skies and 
when the wheels left the asphalt, 
she could feel It’s do or die. 
When she forced her eyes open 
she was floating in the sky 
 
And it was fabulous, fantastic, 
it was even kind of fun 
It felt freeing to be flying 
so much closer to the sun. 
And when the flight was over 
she cried Look how far I’ve come. 
Why flee from fear when I can fly? 
There’s the greatest high . 
You can see if you are able 
there’s a moral to this fable. 
You’re safe and sound on the ground 
it’s comfy staying stable 
Fighting diffidence can be difficult 
we can all identify. 
But if you face your fear and do it 
you may find that you can fly.