Bowling For Soup Val Kilmer Lyrics

Val Kilmer Lyrics

I always thought my movie would be a comedy

Not quite the tragedy that it's become

More slapstick than chick-flick

More 'Caddyshack' than 'Breakfast At Tiffany's'



So, thank me at the podium

For a lifetime of contribution

Turn on the cameras, someone cue the extras

Hair and makeup, to the set



Because the big screen's calling

Final casting call

It's your big shot, baby

You're the next big star



Of another stupid movie

'Bout a guy with a broken heart

Who's falling apart



You're headed for the cutting room floor

  (Headed for the cutting room floor)

And in the sequel, honey

I'm the guy who gets the girl



So if you miss my movie, get the DVD

Check out the chemistry between you and me

Less 'Raising Arizona'

More 'Steel Magnolias'



So when you walk down that red carpet

I hope you trip and fall

I hope someone squirts you with a water gun

A super soaker filled with pee



Because the big screen's calling

Final casting call

It's your big shot, baby

You're the next big star



Of another stupid movie

'Bout a guy with a broken heart

Who's falling apart



You're headed for the cutting room floor

  (Headed for the cutting room floor)

And in the sequel, honey

I'm the guy who gets the girl



All apologies to Kevin Costner

And that chick from 'Monster'

Give me Adam Sandler, Will Ferrell

Belushi and even Val Kilmer

He was funny in 'Real Genius'



What about 'Top Gun'?

No, 'Top Gun' wasn't funny, whatever

'Top Secret' was funny too

But he sucked as Batman



Because the big screen's calling

Final casting call

It's your big shot, baby

You're the next big star



Of another dumb movie

'Bout a guy with a broken heart

I'm falling apart



Steven Spielberg's calling

And he's sending a car

It's your big shot, baby

You're the next big star



Of another stupid movie

'Bout a guy with a broken heart

Who's falling apart



You're headed for the cutting room floor

  (Headed for the cutting room floor)

And in the sequel, honey

I'm the guy who gets the girl



Who gets the girl

I'm the guy that gets the girl

  (Adam Sandler, Will Ferrel, Belushi and Akroid)

Who gets the girl

  (Chris Farley, Bill Murray in Stripes)

I'm the guy that gets the girl



(Eddie Murphy 'til 90, Chris Rock and John Candy)

Who gets the girl

  (The cast of Hollywood Knights)

I'm the guy that gets the girl



(Mike Myers, Jim Carry and the Farelly Brothers)

Who gets the girl

(Are more my style)

I'm the guy that gets the girl



(Terms Of Endearment, I didn't get it)

Who gets the girl

  (I'd much rather shut up and smile)

I'm the guy that gets the girl



(Adam Sandler, Will Ferrel, Belushi and Akroid)

Who gets the girl

  (Chris Farley, Bill Murray in Stripes)

I'm the guy that gets the girl



(Eddie Murphy 'til 90, Chris Rock and John Candy)

Who gets the girl

  (The cast of Hollywood Knights)

I'm the guy that gets the girl