Double Diet Lyrics

Double Diet lyrics

[Parody of "Picture" by Kid Rock and Cheryl Crow]



I live on burgers, Cheetos, and ice cream

Got nothing but lard in my blood stream

Guess my sweet tooth was something more than a phase

Been fueling up on cupcakes and Twinkies

Gained so much weight my girl left me

She said to call her if I ever change my ways



I put the pizza away

Went on a diet today

I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her

I put the pizza away

I'm gonna lose some weight

I can't wait till I get thin then I'll show her



I missed you last night at the hotel

I even missed your bacon and beer smell

Then it finally dawned on me how to make things right

I pulled up to a fast food venue

Ordered everything on the menu

Time to go back home and stuff my face



Picked up a pizza today

I'm gonna power binge

I'm gonna eat till nothing's left in the fridge

I'm gonna hit the buffet

I'm gonna gain some weight

I can't wait till I get fat then I'll show him



Been hitting Ben and Jerry's for breakfast

You know I finally got the hang of this Slim Fast

Since you've been gone

I've been gaining/losing so much weight

I've been jogging instead of taking the car

I've been eating mayonaise straight from the jar

I was making dessert

I was off to lift some weights



Now I'm liking what I see on the scale

So I sent a picture out in the mail

Oh hey look you sent one too

Let's just.. whoa, hey wait / OMG!



I saw your picture today

I see you've changed your ways

You know I think I liked you better the way you were

I saw your picture today

I see you lost/gained some weight

I just called to say don't bother to come back home

I just called to say don't bother to come back home