Monica Interview Lyrics

Monica Interview

featuring Lil' Kim *

* All snippets of Monica's +responses+ are Lil' Kim
record samples

[Chris Rock]
Thanks for the interview Monica
Now
Monica everyone seems to think they know ALL there is to know
about Monica
Lewinsky but Monica could you tell us one thing
that people would be
surprised to know about you?

"I used to be scared of the dick; now I
throw lips to the shit
Handle it like a real bitch.."

[Chris
Rock]
Very interesting! Now Monica, there seems to be a lot of demands
on
your time. Could you tell us what a quiet evening with
Monica Lewinsky would
be like?

"Got buffoons eatin my pussy while I watch
cartoons.."

[Chris Rock]
Hmm, sounds like fun!
Now Monica, who
were your role models?

"Zsa Zsa Gabor, Demi Moore, Prince Diane and all
them rich bitches.."

[Chris Rock]
Now in the transcript, you refer to
the President as Butthead
Did the President have any nicknames for
you?

"Poon-poon nanny-nanny, punanni danni.."

[Chris
Rock]
Ahh, cute!
Now Monica, you and the President had a lot of phone
sex.
What was the one thing that you would say to the President
that
would make him acheive orgasm?

"Before you nut, I'ma dribble down your
buttcheek
Make you wiggle, then giggle just a little.."

[Chris
Rock]
Now Vernon Jordan helped you get a job
What's the first thing you
said when you met Vernon Jordan?

"It's on nigga what? Pussy greased
up
Stack the G's up, keeps the knees up.."

[Chris Rock]
So are you
saying you had an affair with Vernon Jordan too?

"I made my intro, gettin
fucked in the Pinto.."

[Chris Rock]
Monica you appear to be having sex
with everybody
How do the interns treat you?

"They be suckin
blackberry molasses out my asses.."

[Chris Rock]
Now now that we're
on it, how come you never had sex with Al Gore?

"I got no patience for
little dick tastin.."

[Chris Rock]
What about Ken Starr?

"He
be lookin fruity, but you still can eat the booty.."

[Chris Rock]
Now
Monica, do you have any regrets about your relationship
with the
President?

"Somethin I wanted, but I never was pushy
The motherfucker
never ate my pussy.."

[Chris Rock]
Hey, here's the President right
now, Bill Clinton!
Now Mr. President, before we go,
is there anything
you'd like to say to Monica Lewinsky?

* Eazy-E sample *
"Bitch shut
the fuck up!
Get the fuck out of here!"